To sleep, perchance to dream...

It's over, the month from Hell. Great Lakes, to Pennsic, to Great Lakes for teardown, home for 1 day and then off to Indianapolis for a week. Very tired.

This was a roller coaster ride. Pennsic was great, but it was camping for two weeks and for the first time, it was work. Sure, helping run Hell Nite and other events was like work, but my livelihood didn't depend on it. When we got back to Great lakes it rained the last weekend. And when we packed up? There just wasn't enough room for everything to go home. We have to go pick some of it up tomorrow.

We dropped off stock to Michigan Ren without incident, but we arrived at GenCon with a LOT of stuff supposedly "in the mail" to us. Most of it arrived. Then, my wallet went missing. We tore apart the room, which was the ONLY place it could be before I reluctantly called the credit card companies and bank to report the loss. It then proceeded to turn up 12 hours later in my wife's corset. When we got back home I learned that my bank did'nt cancel the most important check card. Swell job guys.

GenCon was a big hit sales-wise. We carried the new brass goggles, some steampunk airship academy t-shirts I designed, and some nifty gothic clothing from a company called Eternal Love. In fact, things went so well we were literally tripping over each other in our cramped space. I have bit the bullet and decided that next year we will get a double space. It's a big expense, but I think it will help us get seen.

Michigan did outstanding its opening day, and then went into the toilet the second. Weird.

And then there's the big news. Great Lakes is being shifted back one week next year. This means it will overlap the opening of Michigan AND GenCon. This is being done because the owner of Great Lakes isn't making much money on the 4th of July weekend. People are off doing family things. So he's decided to screw EVERYONE. There was no warning about this. Rossana only noticed it because she actually reads contracts and other documents. I am furious. I've been with this show for over 12 years but I am willing to just walk away if they do this. Screw them. My only major headache is that I JUST bought a fucking booth that I spend a good chunk of time cleaning up and painting. I think I can sell it but it would have been better if I had started that process during the season for exposure.

Pennsic could easily replace Great Lakes and I'd get 4 weeks of my life back. I don't want to give up Great Lakes, but I simply will NOT take their bullshit. It would be damn near impossible to have decent stock and staff for three events.

Sigh.

I'm glad to be home. I spent a few hours trying to put away all my tools and clean up my shop a little. Everything is a mess. My office, the garage, my shop even the yard still has traces of the party left over here and there.

At the starting gate...

Tomorrow is thew last day we'll be home for a while. After tomorrow we leave the cats in the care of our sitters and head off to work Great Lakes AND Pennsic. I am apprehensive about doing Pennsic as a merchant. In the 20+ years I have been going it has always been my vacation. I started going when I was 16. I've never missed one. Eventually working in medieval clothing became by job and I still went. Due to overlapping schedules the last few years I have had to leave Pennsic to go and do a Ren Faire. And now? I leave a show, to go do a 2 week show. When I get back from that I'll run up to Michigan to drop off stuff for a show and then go do a show.

Wow.

We did this last year and it somehow all worked out. Except that last year Pennsic was still my vacation.

I'm feeling bad because I won't be able to hang out in my home camp of Pentwyvern as much. It's changed a lot over the years, but I still consider it home. It is an old and comfortable pair of shoes. But working the show means I can't help as much with set up or other camp activities.

On the other hand I helped build our camps shower trailer, ran a chair making day at the house, helped design and build our awesome siege tower and helped create and run Hell Nite, our massive and very fun camp party.

I should feel fine about taking time off from camp stuff. But I don't. Then there's the fact that Pennsic last year was BRUTALLY hot. We are still in a war and the economy is in the shitter. I hear rumors about a 17% drop in attendance. Gas is $4 a gallon. People are stuggling just to get to the event. Will they buy?

Deep breath.

On the up side, I will still be at Pennsic. This is where my friends are. It is still one of the coolest events around, and I have attended my fair share of events now. If you're at war and have a few minutes, feel free to stop by ther booth. I promise I won't try to sell you anything. (Although I can't promise you won't buy anything).

Another reason I love Germany...

Rossana bought a cheap pair of sunglasses in Germany and at some point near the end of the trip they went AWOL. We just assumed we'd left them on the bus or at a cafe. It turns out we had left them at the house of a friend we visited there.

So what does he do? He mails them back to us in the US! Not content with bubble plastic he also bought a case for them just to make sure they arrived safe and sound along with a CD of images he took in Egypt a few years ago where we met him. Germany (and those that reside within its borders) rock.

Albert, you're the man!

Death and Funk

The phone rang too early.

"Hello?" I asked blearily.

"You're working Maron this weekend, right? In Columbus?" a voice asked.

"Yeah."

"I thought you should know that your Guest of Honor, Robert Asprin just died."

"Swell."

It never bodes well when a conventions guest of honor passes away expectantly. I wasn't a rabid far but I did enjoy his written work and always planned on reading more some time. And now? Well, the show goes on...

Lindsey and I went to load the car and the moment we opened the door to the van I knew something was wrong. The van reeked of death.

Something much have carwled up into so inaccessable hole and died. Fabreeze did almost nothing. Death weas everywhere. Not a good sign.

There was no time to investigate, we loaded up and drove down to Columbus with the windows open.

Marcon is one of the VERY few shows that is run by pretty damn competent trained monkeys. This is in stark contrast to the majority of shows, conventions and even Ren Faires we do over the course of the year. They do not loose paperwork. They send you a map of where the loading dock is. They help you unload!!!! And when you're set up? They offer free soda and cookies. Really. For this I and the rest of my fellow godless capitallists are eternally grateful.

The crowd was looking a bit thin at the start of things. I mean almost scarce. There are always theories for this. The economy, gas prices, competing events. We merchants are great at determining reasons why the hall isn't packed like it used to be. But that didn't mattter. Once the doors opened we started moving corsets. And with the influx of people comes the usual cast of 'colorful' characters.

Charly is what many long time con-goers would call a 'creepy camera guy'. Short, heavy-set, thick glasses and thin mustach. He is constantly taking pictures, usually of women. I used to avoid him if at all possible. He didn't seem to hang with any of the social groups that I did. But Rossana is a kinder soul than I and a better judge of character. She talked with him and then I got to talking with him a few years back. Now he shows up with stacks of prints which he gives away for free to people he photographed the previous year. He's no Ansel Adams, but he's actually a pretty nice guy. Last year the day after the con he was nearly killed when a kid with no license and no insurance crashed into him while he was riding his bike (he doesn't have a car). I was taken alittle aback. Marcon without Charley wouldn't feel right.

Not long after another friend I haven't seen in quite a while stopped by. His story was even wierder. It seems that he, after studying for and obtaining his conceal carry gun permit, had purchased a handgun several onths back. He bought the gun at about 11am. What happened next is a little unclear. But he somehow managed to take the loaded weapon and for reasons known only to him, went to tuck it between his legs. In doing this he somehow cocked the gun, and then discharged it. He shot himself in the leg at about 4pm, five hours after getting the gun. Luckily he missed his ding-ding and the femoral artery. It was a clean through and through. He drove himself to the hospital. He's had some legal troubles as a result, which strangely enough would have been far worse if he hadn't gotten his conceal carry permit. This was why I hadn;t heard from him in a while.

By the end of the day I was feeling dizzy from the wierdness that pervaded the air. Rossana turned in but Lindsey and I were restless. We hit a room party on the fifth floor of the Hyatt Regency. This is the floor specifically set aside for parties. This is where many of the legendary U.B.S. Casual Star Trek themed parties took place. Parties that would generate so much body hear and funk that the fire alarms often went off. The party we attended was thrown by a fellow merchant and wasn't too big. I helped serve drinks a while before I had to get out. Hotel room air conditioners simply cannot handle 20 people in them at the same time. I needed air.

I took up position in the celebrity autograph area which was empty at that late hour. I used a crayon to make two signs "Free Advice" and "Free Insults". This kept us busy for a while and even earned me a $5 tip.

We wrapped things up Sunday and drove home bone tired, the van still smelling of death, but it didn't matter. We were alive, our friends were still alive. That was the important thing.

Pretty Pictures

Safely back in the states. But there's lots to do. We're off to Marcon this weekend but I wanted to throw up a few of the more artsy pictures I took in Germany. have a look-see.

Germany - Artsy Pics

Misnomer...

I am not sure why they call it the 'Romantic Road'. Oh sure, it's scenic as hell. Rolling Green hills passing through quaint medieval towns. But this involves driving. In Germany. It takes three years and about 3000 euros to get a drivers license here. They know what the hell they are doing on the road.

I, by comparison, do not.

Our first day with the car was not so much Romantic Road as 'Mad Max'. With yelling. It is better today. We are in Dinklesbüle south of Rothenburg. Great little town. Winding streets with surprises around every corner. We may be trapped here a while. The town appeared abandoned most of the day. It was eerie. Like a zombie movie. The cause was a championship soccer match with the Beyer team won. TV's are showing the city of Munich in a state of ecstatic celebration. Wait till the beer kicks in and the rioting begins. We haven't reserved a room there yet, not sure if we can. Then there's the problem of not wanting to leave. We love this place. Really. I could learn to live in a medieval city, to recycle, to drink beer and have streets clean enough to eat off of. I could get used to trains that run on time, politeness and more kinds of sausage than you can shake a stick at.

And then there's the German addiction to Ice Cream and Baked goods. Don't get me started.

Gotta go now, the bells of the church are chiming the hour. Cake time.

I am a bad person...

I must be. When we rolled into the medieval walled city of Rothenberg we were just blown away. Sparred from bombing in WWII is is so well preserved. But the tour only allowed 2 hours or so to see it all. We might wave grudgingly accepted this fate except that THAT very day a medieval pageant was going on commemorating the town being saved from an invading Swiss army. Apparently the Swiss general bet the mayor that he couldn't drink 6 liters of his towns best wine. The Mayor stepped up and delivered. And now the streets were filled with musketeers, artists, pikemen, musicians, a period market.

This was torture.

And what were we supposed to see after a mere two hours in this paradise?

Dachau concentration camp.

And so, we quickly found a local tourism office, tracked town a schedule for the trains, found the tour director and told him outright that we were staying and that we would make our way to Munich on our own. He let us go and we spent the day in the town. Amazing.

Does this make me a bad person? I don't know. At the end of the day as we saw next to a drunken squad of German soldiers I had to admit that my soda tasted no less delicious.

And if I wanted to be technical, we did visit Dachau. Our train passed through the station on our way to the city. So..... Yeah.

Now we're in the Black Forrest region, eating torte and drinking schnapps. Tomorrow he head to Heidelberg and then back to Frankfurt.

Sausages!

Nuremberg

Yesterday we abandoned the tour group and made our way to Leipzig for the Wave Gothic Treffin event. Think Pennsic for goths. What an event. What a day. I will have to wait until I get home to tell the tales of that day. I think it unwise to discuss details while I am still in the country and could face prosecution. Needless to say we made it back to Dresden just in time to head out to the lovely city of Nuremberg.

I am enjoying the tour more and more. Yes, it has drawbacks but we are covering a lot of ground. The one dark cloud so far is and whacking big pain in the ass...Rita.

Rossana pegged her as trouble the moment she opened her mouth. Loud, constantly interrupting, butting into conversations. She rambles endlessly. And it's not just us, she annoys everyone in the group. After a few days of observation we pegged her as suffering some form of metal illness. This doesn't make her any less annoying. People are actively trying to avoid her, but that's not easy.

I have come to really appreciate Germany. It is clean in every sense and they are really going green. There are wind turbines everywhere. Urinals that don't use water. Recycling. The air, the sky, they are somehow brighter.

Today our guide talked about the process of reunification or what happened after the wall came down. It was quite a struggle. West Germany basically inherited an entire country that was broken and broken badly. It took years and Billions of Euros on top of the already high taxes Germans pay. But they did it. So why can't the US rebuild the Gulf Coast?

There is more, much more. I've taken lots of pics, some of which I really hope come out like the armory in the Zwinger Palace or the Altes Museum in Berlin.

Tomorrow we visit Dachau. I would prefer to skip it. My interest in Germany is based in its more distant past. We've already seen several examples of the brutality and waste that was communism in the DDR. This morning we visited a tiny town of only 60 people that was cut in half by the East/West border. For forty years the townspeople couldn't talk or see each other, separated by barbed wire and guard towers. Insanity. Dachau will be far worse.

After that its on to Munich for two days. And after that, we are on our own. So far nothing at home seems to have broken down or caught fire. (knock on wood).

No time! Must keep moving!

We are in lovely Hamburg. This is one clean country. Efficient and well maintained. Took a short Rhein cruise which convinced me that should we ever return we will take a longer one. Because we have a lot of ground to cover we cannot visit some small towns. Todaz, Berlin and some of their wonderful museums.

The group is mixed, I am, alas the youngest person on it. We have stayed at only modern hotels so far, a concession to American demands no doubt. Too bad, I would have like to try some grottty little local Gasthaus.

Limited web access. Most hotels try to rape you for it. Everything is pretty damn expensive. A coke, is 4 to 5 bucks. I need to get back to Turkey where the dollar has some punch. Gotta go, the bus is loading. The weather here is great. Spring is in full bloom and the rolling countyside is great.

More when I get a free moment. Onward, ever onward...

Hack wheeeze cough

Back from Biloxi but sick as a dog. CoastCon was a bit of a letdown. The convention center isn't done with renovations, attendance was a bit light and no one had any damn money.

But I'm still glad I went.

I wanted to see Biloxi again. See how it was faring. I got a chance to drive around a bit and I must say that things are looking pretty good on the surface. The mountains of debris are gone. The uprooted trees, boats and smashed houses. There are empty concrete slabs along the coast, but there is also a flurry of building. Oddly, the coast looks better without the squat barge/casinos.

I drove by the stadium where I worked witht he Salvation Army. They are still there. Dedicated folks those guys. When I went by the church where we had stayed with Hands On USA there was no sign of them. Packed up and helping out elsewhere I guess.

There was no time to get to New Orleans. And If there had been I might have been depressed by the lack of progress.

While in Biloxi I stayed with Vlad and his lovely wife, which is always a hoot. We ate well and told stories of Pennsics past. I would like to have stayed another day down there but Lindsey had school projects and I had to start work on the new booth at the Great Lakes Faire. Rossana and I made a good start. Raking up and clearing out the last remnants of the old RenBoots stuff. Technically this booth has the largest sales area of all out shops! There is painting and carpentry and decorating to do but we have time for that. I can't tell you how nice it is not to have to tent a show. It's a pant to set up, keep dry, take down and store a tent.

With the better weather the house can be tended to. Rossana had trimmed back the grape vines and I have started to gather up lawn debris. Lots of house projects to do. And never enough time.

Technology...is there anything it CAN do?

Back on the road at the North Carolina Ren faire. This is the show we specifically bought a GPS unit for. This expensive bit of technology frankly has NO idea where the hell anything is. We justhad the unit repaired and I'm beginning to think that it was a waste of money. Of course, this area DOES have a lot of construction. We had to hit Walmart for some lights. My iphone got us the address.

But when we got to the area the store was literally hidden behind some low hills and scrubs. Bonus? NO SIGNS. I understand cities not wanting large ugly signs soaring into the sky. I do. But NO signs? We only found the place by sheer chance.

I would hate to be a business in this area. You could be giving away free bars of gold with complimentary steak diners and blowjobs but there's no way anyone will ever find you in this place of madness.

Other than that, all is well. Setup went fine. It will be cold tomorrow. Well, 60 degrees. That is considered cold around these parts. In Ohio we go out and play water polo in the freshly thawed lake. Go figure.

Related to absolutely nothing, GO SEE 'DOOMSDAY". It totally rocks. Don't think about it too much. Just enjoy the pretty pictures. Double bonus? The use of Frankie Goes to Hollywoods "Two Tribes" during a car chase straight out of Mad Max 2.

MegaCon and more

I ran into R2 at the Con. He looks good for his age but I thought he might want to try out "The Shatner" model to keep that slight gut in check.


















The very rare double headed Rhino. She's a beauty!





















THIS is what you look like after the ride that "doesn't get you very wet" according to my beloved wife.

















Two lorikeets sharing some nectar at Busch Gardens

Back at it

We cruised down to Chattanooga, TN for Chattacon. It's held at the...wait for it...Chatanooga Choo Choo hotel, which is actually several hotels and buildings lumped together. The main building is an old train station that is very beautiful if you (like me) love rivets and girders. Several train cars are actually rooms you can stay in. There are three hotel buildings and the convention rooms.

The facility has seen some wear and tear. I imagine it takes a lot to maintain this place and it needs a little TLC. The event itself had moderate attendance at best. We had a good spot in the dealers room, which is rare. We were only open for a short time on Friday but by mid-saturday several dealers were asking us "So, how ya' doing?".

Dealers rarely divulge how much they are actually making at an event. I never give numbers as it seems to be poor taste and you never know who works for the IRS. But one can take the above statement and discern a great deal by HOW it is asked.

If you're chatting with a dealer and he eventually asks "How are you doing? He is having a pretty good day and hopes you are as well.

If a dealer comes and talks to you and asks "How ya doing today?" He likely had a good first day but is slow second day."

And if several dealers ask"So, how you doing?" It means "Are you sucking as bad as I am, please say yes so I don't feel like I'm doing something wrong god why did I ever do this crappy show". The 'So' is the telltale sign that everyone is just hoping to cover hotel costs, food and gas to get home.

Of course, if you don't have time to chat, things are actually going great. You're making money.

Somehow, we managed to do fairly well. This was in contrast to everyone else we spoke with. There were four tshirt vendors, an over saturation by any definition. There were two other corset dealers but our selection, quality and superior sales technique helped us out.

The very cool Nigel deSade was there as well as Jenny Breeden from the web comic The Devils Panties.

After the long Saturday sales day we wandered over to the Con suite and did a little impromptu drumming and dancing (I drumming, Rossana showing the younger generation that she has forgotten more than they will ever know)

We then wandered over to a room party with a Firefly theme run by some dedicated browncoats that was pretty cool. There was punch and chinese food and they had decorated the room with props and cammo netting. A guy even gave me some prop colonial money he'd designed. Sweet.

Achingly Beautiful

In addition to my love of paper ephemera, I have a deep love of old books and journals. So, of course any place that stockpiles them, any place that lavishly displays thousands of tomes in soaring cathedral like locals is enough to send my salivary glands into overdive. I present to you a wonderful collection of libraries I will some day have sex in around the world. Wait...what? Forget the sex part. I meant visit, libraries i will visit someday.

Courtesy of Curious Expeditions

The most amazing thing you've ever seen...

People throw that term around a lot. But i think I can safely say that the following link will take you to a story about a place so amazing, made in secret by people with such passion, that you will agree with my statement that it is the most amazing thing ever. I don't know if it's possible to visit this place, but I am damn well going to try.


I give you, The Temples of Damanhur

I present to you..

Mr. and Mrs. Holiday! That's the new name and I rather like it. It will take a while to get used to. Goodman has been just Goodman for so long that he has entered the one-name celebrity circle, like Cher or Bono.

The wedding went off without any real hitches. There was a part in the ceremony where the parents stood and gave their blessings but in all the excitement leading up to the event kelly and Good forgot to actually tell the parents this. Luckily they had a pro at the wheel (cough me cough) and we smoothly got the parents to give their hearty blessings without missing a beat. The ceremony even had a small part for Hanah, Kellys daughter, who seems to dig Goodman and the feeling is mutual. I will have pics soon from family as I took none of my own. It was a very fun wedding. The laser tag contest to determine the best man was a blast. I am proud to say that I took second place. All those days I spent playing Photon in my youth were not wasted.

The pizza place/arcade/go cart/laser tag place was pretty cool and everyone seemed to be enjoying themselves tremendously. Sometimes adults don't play enough. I got Rossana to play a samurai sword fighting game that uses a virtual sword you really swing and she rocked on it.

After the ceremony I signed the marriage certificate. As I had registered with the Universal Life Church so that my job as minister would be legit, I took great and wicked delight as listing my title as "The Right Revered Steven Pack". You may feel free to address me by this title when you see me, but I insist you say it correctly, loudly and with a slight southern accent.

I also hope to post a copy of the wedding program which is one of the funniest reads I have had in a while.

My nerdiness is showing...

The History channel is playing the Young Indiana Jones Adventures, a show I really liked back when it first came out. The show follows a 9 year old and a teenage version of Indy in his adventures around the globe. The ones with the younger Indy I never really liked as much, the child actor isn't that good and the pacing of the shows is bad. I do give them points for actually filming on location. The Moroccan episode is pretty good but an Egyptian segment left me scratching my head. In it, the young Indy and his tutor are left high and dry by their camel driver when they decide to climb one of the small Pyramids on the Giza plateau. Aside from the unlikeliness of a guide abandoning the balance of his pay, there are NO other tourists in the area??? By the time they get down the sun is setting. A young T.E. Lawrence arrives on a bike and they decide to make a camp for the night using camel dung for fuel.

But having been to the Giza plateau I know that its actually a very short walk from the Pyramids to the edge of Cairo. In fact, we could see the Pyramids from our hotel room at the Mena house Hotel (which was a hotel at the turn of the century as well). They could have walked a few hundred yards, sat down for tea and gotten a cab. Hardly an epic journey.

I know they had to raise the tension but I hate when basic facts are messed with. I won't even go into the Egyptology parts where they meet up with Howard Carter in the Valley of the Kings. They show a man blasting the area with dynamite, which I don't believe Carter ever did since the area is unstable limestone, (although the Italian Egyptologist Caviglia did use Dynamite on one of the pyramids).

I know, I know. It's just a show. But it bugs me.

Off to Spain! or maybe not...

For months I've been thinking that we are going to go to Spain this Winter or early Spring if money is available. It's a country that I heard some wonderful things about and I literally promised a dying man I would visit it some day. But finding a tour company with an itinerary we like has not worked out so well. I don't care about discos, or modern cities or shoe shopping. I know there is a lot to see there, it's just been hard to find a company that focuses on it. So today we're in Oberlin and on a whim we go into AAA to see if they can help. In short, nothing they showed us was super amazing. But as I was leafing through the Winter tour brochure of Europe my eye fell on a Danube River cruise. And unlike the Spain tours, this one promises to be dripping with Medieval castles, markets, monasteries and palaces.

Germany knows what appeals to it's visitors and is all too happy to oblige them. The travel is by boat so only one unpacking. More time to see and do.

Of course, doing Spain by ourselves is a real option. Get our own car. It's left hand drive (we've driven in the UK but it's always nice to be in ones comfort zone when driving public roads with crazy people). We could set our own itinerary, see some really obscure sites. On the other hand we're talking Germany and Austria here and that means pastries. And I like pastries.

Timing is the other concern. The German tour is in December, a time of the year when Rossana and I both get itchy. It's weird. We don't like Xmas here, but we're thinking about visiting Germany at the same time of year. Maybe their Xmas doesn't feel like an loud consumer buybuybuy whorefest.

It's time to go, man. Go go go.

The world is vast and beautiful and while it looks great on TV, you can't experience it that way.